Doubt

Let us speak together about doubt. I tell you when attending satsang, not to bring doubt along with you. I receive many letters describing beautiful experiences, but they all end with: "Am I on the right path?" Also the people who leave here begin to experience doubts.

It is like someone going to dig rubies in the river in Bihar State, where rubies are found. A man finds a ruby on the sand at the riverside but he throws it away. He doubts his luck, "How can I find it so easily?" he says, so he throws it back in the river. "People around me are digging for 150 feet and they still have not found anything, so I will throw it away." He doubts, "Is it a ruby or a piece of glass?"

Doubt is the only thing that is troublesome. The books of knowledge give you the highest teaching directly, only doubt stands between you and that teaching. Since time immemorial they have been passing this ancient teaching from chest to chest that "You are That." The teaching was coming directly, only doubt exists between you and That. Secondly it is taught that "I am Brahman." and thirdly "All this what I see, feel, hear, touch and taste is all myself." But doubt is in the way so that we don't believe.

It is true of all the teachings: if we listen without doubt one word is quite enough. When you come to satsang do not entertain doubt by questioning, "Is it going to happen to me?" Do not use the intellect as a test stone, because it will not give you the correct indication of gold. Throw it away. But many are not ready to do that so they will not get the point. They will take this teaching and continue to suffer endlessly, for immeasurable time. Your suffering will not end unless you remove this doubt from within you.

Somehow, since my childhood I have not carried any doubt. I didn't have doubt, I had never heard of doubt, because my first teacher was my own mother. Whatever she told me instantly happened to me. I was a child and I never knew or heard about doubt. I got it instantly. She used to tell me stories and they manifested in front of me instantly because I had no doubt whether this reality or not. Usually when you hear a story you entertain doubts. I tell you stories here as the mothers tell stories to their children, but they are not really stories. This is truth in an essence, in simple words, spoken in story form.

I will tell you a story about doubt which I have heard from my mother when I was six or seven years old. In ancient times people used to go to satsang early in the morning, at four in the morning, before going to their business or office. In my own town in Pakistan there was a bank manager. He used to conduct satsang in his own house from four to five. About twenty people used to gather and he used to speak on a book called Vichar Sagar, I remember. It's a very ancient book of direct teachings from Vedanta, written by a Punjabi saddhu called Nichildas. I used to attend that morning meeting when I was very small, maybe seven or eight. This was happening every morning and evening. There used to be gatherings in my own town, vedanta teaching, devotional teaching, yoga teaching and kundalini yoga. All these different teachings were there. There were also discourses in the evening. This was only 70 or 80 years ago. People used to take their food and sit near their lane to attend the Satsang till 10:30 or 11:00 and then come back home. Morning and evening satsang were a must for everybody. He may be an office boy, he may be a business man, he may even be a worker. Even people who were driving hand carts used to attend.

About one bandit – robber - this was also a profession. Some go for satsang and some go for their game in the night, so he goes. So one day he was passing, he just heard someone speaking about… about a young boy having a diamond padded cap on his head and a garland of celestial gems around his neck and that's all he heard; and he stopped. He sat down near the gathering and listened. So at about 10:30 this satsang was over and the priest has collected whatsoever money was given to him after. After satsang some money's left for the priest and some gift also; so he collected and put them in a bag. And everyone is leaving for his house and he's leaving for his house - his family is waiting. This is his profession, to recite stories in the evenings.

And he's going his way and this man [the bandit] just went to him… asked him, “Give me the address of this boy you spoke about – having the diamond imbedded cap and the garland of gems around his neck… a garland. Give me this address.” Now this Brahmin priest, he's reading a story. This man tells him, "Give me the address of this boy." He says, "You know that path going to the river Yamuna, that side. At that time he goes for bath every morning at four o'clock. You go there and you will see him." "Okay, let's find. But I cannot… I cannot recognize him. I've not seen him. You come with me." So he said, “My family is waiting for me and later on your family, you know.” Then he put the pistol on the chest and he gave his introduction now: "I do not know him. You come with me and you simply tell me this man, that's all, and then you go. But two cannot hide behind one tree. You stay in that tree and I in this tree. You simply point out this is the boy and then that's all. Then I will come." And then he tied him with the rope so that he doesn't run away.

Time is now 11 p.m. He [robber] has tied him [priest]. He's hiding and now the time is passing - 11 to 4. This man spoke like this is a story, and this man says, “He didn't take it as story; he took it's a fact.” And this priest is counting every minute of his death, and this robber is counting every minute of his luck, “I will have this diamond. I'll be very rich, you see. I'll be very rich.” So he's totally concentrated. Nothing else… nothing else between him, and his mind is only concentrating on the diamond and this boy which he described - a young boy wearing a cap imbedded with diamonds, garland around his neck. Time is passing… time is passing now. This thought that this boy having diamonds around his neck. Now the time is now 4 o'clock.

And now this thought itself has manifested. You can also manifest what you think; you are not away from your thought. You are a thought itself - you become what you think. You become what you think instantly. You… you are thought. You have conviction, “I am the body.” so you are. You listen every day, “You are existence, consciousness, bliss.” This is also a thought, nothing else. Because conviction of the body is stronger than this conviction that, “I am consciousness. I am bliss.” So whatever is the stronger thought so you become. There's no doubt - you are thought itself.

So at 4 a.m. this manifested itself. The boy comes in front of him and gave him the garland and the cap he was wearing himself. “So it's very nice of you, but wait… don't go away… because I didn't have your address. There is another partner in this deed and you have something else that I did not hear. I only heard cap of the diamonds and the garland but you have something on your arm also. So this I will… this gift I will give to this priest. You come with me.” So he took this boy in front of that one. He's still tied with the rope. He thought, “He's now going to kill me. He's going to kill me.” Before reaching him he folded hands, “Sir, I told you a story from the book. Don't kill me. My wife, my children are waiting for me. Don't kill me now. I told a story - it was a story only.” Then he says, “No, no, no. You were right. I'm very thankful to you. Exactly at that time here is the boy; here is the boy and here are the diamonds. And I can only take garland and only the cap but here is something on his arm also, so I will give you this gift. Still he doesn't believe. He said, “Don't, don't, don't bluff me please. You have to kill now… kill me now, that's all. Kill me.” “You don't see?” “No, no, no, I don't see. I don't see.” Then he says, “You see this… you see this hand?” With the touch of his hand he saw who this boy was… who this boy was. And this Brahmin, this priest, now immediately saw, “I am confronting him.” He untied the priest and this priest prostrated in front of this bandit and never returned home. And this man - this is a true story - he is known as Bandit Saint. He is known as Bandit Saint still.

So I am just speaking about doubts you see. This doubt is the only thing that gives you trouble, so without doubt if you have straight away this teaching as the story has been told to you, you just listen. Anything if it is even falsely told to you it will materialize. You simply hear the word; it will manifest.

Let the teacher tell you, “You are consciousness.” and you simply hear without doubt – and what's going to happen? You listen from the teacher that you are existence, you are consciousness, you are eternal, you are deathless, you are not the body. What does he tell you that is wrong? But you don't listen to him. What wrong is there? But you have a conviction, “I am suffering, I am born, I have to die because I have listened from my parents, I have listened from my priest. So nothing is going to work.” So it's not good to have any doubt in your mind when you speak about it, you see. And it is so simple not to have doubt - it's so simple. So simple and there is no confusion if you don't entertain doubt that you are what you are. Only this veil is a doubt you see. So this veil, this doubt has become this manifestation and this is your own creation, this is your own creation, you see. And if you don't have this doubt of, “Where is the creation, and who is the creator?” then instantly you will know who you really were and are.

3 July, 1992